My totally opposite lifestyle comparisons, and how I could not sustain either. Both extremes in one year.
It started with my world at that time falling apart, like all extremists I ended up fasting for faith and throwing everything into it. The problem was when I finished my fast I regained some faith but ended up continuing purely because I kept losing so much weight.
I spent 6 months of my life living on only potato wedges, some fruits, and water.
I just wasn't interested in food, at all! I barely ate.
The sad part of all this was, that I got so many compliments on the way I looked here.
I over-trained myself as a punishment. I went past the point where I enjoyed sports.
My weight wasn't necessarily the problem it was how I got there and the effects my choices in diet had on me.
Even with all the compliments, I was still so unhappy. So many things in my body itself weren't working.
It took me years to accept my beauty and weight at which I am happy and can live sustainably. Just due to society and its views.
Along with the many side effects of weighing too little, I fell off the wagon completely.
This leads me to:
Overeating and not caring, ( I deleted most of these photos as I hated the memories of them, but found this one, I did look a lot worse in others)
I ate to fill this emotional void I couldn't deal with, the more I gained on the scale the more I ate and the uglier I felt.
I came to a point in my life where I couldn't even walk past 500m without breathing intensely and I literally had to go up 4 sizes in my clothes.
The was the heaviest I have ever been. My skin was bad, my hair was dull and my moods terrible and the worst my faith and emotional state has ever been.
This lasted about 6 months
In neither of these, did I find >God >myself >happiness >sustainability >wellness >balance >peace
I was in my second year of studying Fitness and Nutrition at that time. My knowledge could not help me, cause I did not want to listen.
I faced the mirror one day and no longer saw myself but this shell of a person. I worked in an industry where I was doing everything wrong with what I was teaching.
a friend took me to church that Sunday and I broke down, my eyes finally opened and I accepted I need to change. Emotionally, spiritually and physically.
When I finally started to listen to my own teachings, genetics, (what a blessing and a curse) stepped in.
There are so many different body types, you know the drill, we all have that one friend who is super good in any type of sport, the other friend who is skinny even though she only eats chocolates, and the one really smart one.
We each have something that makes us unique and special and our genes are no different.
and yes, genes do affect the way we diet, exercise, lose weight, and our running speed to name a few.
When I was younger, my parents were not really bothered with sports or having me do them. I wasn't really good at them either, so we did not bother. It was only when I went to a different primary school that we were forced to take a sport. (Thank goodness though)
So my life before that was basically no exercise, and bad foods - we mostly ate takeaways, meat, and bread. Which did not help genetically inclined me.
It took time to experiment and find what works for my body. I'll never be a 100m sprinter, my legs feel like tree stumps but I have become quite good in weight training and long-distance sports where speed isn't always needed.
Once I started to get to know my body I was able to adjust and become what I wanted.
I had to accept I will never be the very skinny girl with those stick legs, and that is totally ok,
Cause I can be so much more and do so much better by accepting where I come from and what makes me unique.
I still have the smart friend and the chocolate eater friend and love them to bits. But I no longer judge myself according to them, and as soon as we realize that and stop comparing we can be happy and become better at who we are.
Our goals also differ and our abilities and motivation differ.
But if you use the social effect purely as your motivation to lose 5kg it's not going to last.
Like all great quotes, It is time to stop caring what others say or how they make you feel.
This is your journey and you determine what's going to make you happy.
Comparing and envy are not going to make you a "Stick-figure silicone Barbie doll"
Instead all these comments people throw at us, intentionally or not are going to drive your self-esteem into the ground!
Your health and wellness are a lot more important than a few comments on the 2kg you lost.
It took me 4 years to stop yoyo dieting and failing at all the advice I can so proudly share now.
After that, I have held my weight and health for years and still do. In 2016 It all turned around.
My journey is a lot more than just the number on the scale.
If I compare my mood and outlook now to 2015 it's worlds apart. They say wisdom comes with age, and it is definitely true...
This fitness journey is a lot more than a few months or a beach body for a December vacation.
We are so easily demotivated or see the setbacks and give up. Just like faith your health and fitness are a marathon, not a sprint.
I know it may seem like your goal is years away, but years ago you might have felt the same way.
I don't do diet culture and quick fixes. Exercising for a few months and expecting wonders don't happen, but if you set smaller goals the years fly by and you realize you have reached a lot more than just that one goal.
I am NOT happy because I am 'skinny'
I AM happy because I am healthy, active, full of energy, my skin glows, my hair is vibrant, my mental state is great, my wellness is balanced, my life is sustainable and not restricting, my life is filled with fun things positive people and so much love.
Thank you for being part of my journey